How to Build a Friend Circle in the Netherlands as an Introvert

 Making friends as an expat in the Netherlands can be daunting, especially if you’re an introvert. Dutch culture values directness and independence, which can make socializing feel even more intimidating. But with the right approach, you can build a meaningful local circle that suits your personality and energy levels. Here’s how to get started:

Way 1: Keep it Small

Big crowds can feel overwhelming for introverts, especially with so many festivals and events in the Netherlands. We get it. So, look for smaller, easy-going events to participate in. In many Dutch cities, there are plenty of meetup groups ideal for introverts. Think book clubs or board games here, as examples. These groups are perfect for quiet, thoughtful discussion, and most of the time, the groups don’t have more than half a dozen people.

Way 2: Leverage Online Communities

If you are even a bit stressed about walking alone to an event, just start by taking an online route. Dutch and expat communities are very lively on Facebook, Reddit, and even Discord.

Try to join groups that revolve around your interests or the city you get to live in: “Expats in Amsterdam” or some hobby-oriented forum. Communicating on topics in the online space encourages goodwill prior to face-to-face, and at times, these communities even have small-scale offline meetups.

Way 3: Think Shared Interests

One way to make new friends is through shared interests. Look into clubs or activities you already like. By sharing the same activity or interest, the chat will flow more naturally, and you will also meet like-minded people. It is common among people here to be members of different organizations, such as sports or creative activities.

Way 4: Volunteer

Volunteering is a great opportunity to socialize in an organized environment, and gives you a purpose. Dutch volunteer groups are all for welcoming international volunteers, and the opportunities vary greatly. From working for a food bank to organizing cultural events, volunteering bonds locals and fellow expats over a shared cause, and because it is a weekly commitment, the people involved will get to know each other, making it suitable for those introverts who prefer deeper, slower connections. The requirement for consistency can ‘force’ those introverted to make friends.

Way 5: Be Open About Being Introverted

If you know you are introverted, then let people know. Also, feel free to say that you’re not against talking to new people, and it’s even one of your goals. Most people will respect your honesty. You’ll also attract like-minded souls. Giving someone more of a road map of your personality is a good way to let them know more about you.

Way 6: Embrace Directness-Dutch Style

It’s not a secret that the Dutch are direct in communication. It may seem as if they are impolite, but in fact, it makes the whole being social thing very easy in a way. You don’t need to second-guess the message or what someone is saying; they’ll let you know! It’s okay to be clear about friendship expectations.

Way 7: Make use of friendship apps

Bumble BFF and similar apps are becoming more popular in the Netherlands for finding friends. You can detail your interests and the people you wish to meet, simplifying the process and bringing you in contact with like-minded individuals. Many of the participants have also recently moved to the country or are just ready to meet new friends, so you never feel lonely in this endeavor because this is something unfamiliar to you.

Final Thoughts

As an introvert in the Netherlands, making friends from scratch is quite a process that requires heaps of patience. There’s no need to lose heart if the connections are not happening overnight. Consistent attendance at events, daily chatting with neighbors, following up with people you’ve matched with, and acknowledging that others are also trying to make new friends will really help a lot.